Sunday, 27 May 2012

...going home.

A month or so ago came the time where if Dave and I wanted to rent this flat for another year, we would have to resign our lease. We were a bit ambivalent about doing so, because we very much hoped to be living in Paisley again by the end of the year, and even if we decided to stay in Dundee, we felt we'd like somewhere a bit bigger, warmer, easier to heat, less leaky.

We've been looking at flats, and found that everything in our price range is much the same as this flat. We've worked out what we pay on bills for both flats, and how much we make in total, and we came to the (startling) conclusion that even with my not working, we'd be better off if we lived in Paisley. Living here means we have nothing spare. No security. And Dave, the main earner, is frustrated and undervalued and often unhappy work.  Paisley is HOME. It's where our own wee flat is. It's where our families are (or at least is drastically closer), and most of our friends. We have a garden there, and space, a functional heating system, lots of light. We want to go back and live there.

Of course Dave works in Dundee. He has to live with 25 miles of the lab. And we need the income at least until he finds something else. But we have both felt unsettled and not at home here for a while, Dave particularly.

We spent an evening working through things.  A seed of an idea that requires us living apart sometimes, but that will make Paisley home again. We talked some more. We looked at stuff on the internet. It would require compromise on both parts - Dave working away at a job where he doesn't feel valued, and my leaving a job that I adore with children that I truly love. But we'd be able to try to set ourselves up for the next few years, give ourselves a little lee-way, and a lot less stress. And we've decided to do it. Because in the end, even if it's initially part time for Dave, we get to go home.

As of the 28th of August, we will be living in Paisley again. Dave will stay in Dundee (we are looking for a flatshare/lodgings) Monday through Thursday and come home for the weekend until he finds a job that's commutable from Paisley. I spoke to my boss on Thursday, who could not have been more lovely, and we decided I will finish work the following week.

Part of me feels like it's madness, giving up a secure and enjoyable job, spending half the week without my husband. In fact, If we kept living together in Dundee, and I spent another winter travelling through rain and cold and snow, my pay wouldn't even pay our rent and mortgage. Our outgoings are much smaller there, so we could both work part time and manage if it came to it. This way we'll be able to save a little too, and look after our rather neglected flat. We'll be working toward living here long term, and feeling settled.

So, I am now job hunting. As is Dave. If I haven't found a job by the time wee move, my job will be sorting out the flat. We hope very much that this will be a temporary situation and that Dave will be living there with me full time within 6 months.

I'm going home. :)

(I'm actually home now. HOME!)

And I get to have a cat...

17 comments:

Lauren said...

Oh that is exciting news! Congratulations, and best of luck. I love big changes like this to stir things up and help me start anew. I bet it's going to be wonderful. Especially with a cat. xx

last year's girl said...

#lisamariesinpaisleyareawesome

I am happy about this.

Siobhan said...

I am so excited for you! xxx

Fay said...

You must feel such a peace now you've made your decision. And so exciting indeed that you can now dedicate 100% of your creative energy on your own flat! X

Lisa E said...

Congratulations!!! How exciting! It sounds like you're making a wise choice, one that will be worth the initial extra effort. Yay for home!

Lisa from Lisa's Yarns said...

I am really excited for you! I know it is scary because you have some things to sort through, but in the long run I think this is going to be a really good change for you guys!

Thinking of you! xoxo

Jack McCallum said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Jack McCallum said...

Fabulous! A little sacrifice for long-term happiness - it will be worth it. And I'm sure Paisley will be welcoming you back with open arms. :)

Hazels Crochet said...

I am very happy that you are going to be moving home, and you get to have a cat!!!
Plus it means we get to do more sisterly things together!

Gareth said...

Exciting times!

JoJo said...

It all will work out and you are half way there- and a lot nearer to me. We must meet up sometime! Very much luck with it all, Jo xx

domestikate said...

Wow this is big news! Sounds like you've made the right decision for you guys - exciting!

Laura said...

Great news! :)

KatGotTheCream said...

Well done on making what sounds like it must have been a really tough decision. I think you both know what's important to you and what makes you most happy and if you can figure that out then you've pretty much got it cracked.

I'm sure you'll both find new jobs in the fullness of time and then everything will fall into place.

How exciting and I'm so glad that you're going back to where your heart/home truly lies.

Good luck with it all xx

Lindsay Jewell said...

Exciting. :)

mathildeheartmanech said...

So happy and excited for you!!! Yay! xx

HannahB said...

ooooh wow- lots of big changes! how exciting and brave to just follow your gut and go for it.